it has been a long time

since i have shown myself here...
i come here
but i make sure i am not in the pictures,
i make sure you can't see me...
my ratty camo pajama pants...
worn in/worn out favorite cable knit hoodie...
hair not done in days
much less dyed...

this "not working" is great for me...
for creativity and me time...
but not so hot for the ego...
i think i need to shake this up a bit...
get back into an exercise routine,
get dressed in the morning,
maybe even run the brush through my hair....

or maybe i'll just make another piece of toast....

school comes to an end...

the kids school year
ends this week...
13 is done today,
9 is done on thursday...

no more lunch crisis's
no more homework....
no early morning band
or waking 9 three times because
he is a night owl...

instead,
they will be home...
with me.
hmmmmm....
this is the first summer that
i have not been working...
what to do with all our free time?
especially when they are hitting the age
that hanging out with mom
is just. not. that. cool.
:O)

today...

there are purple flowers
in a mason jar
on my kitchen table...

there is the sound of kid's voices
and the squeak of the trampoline
as they wrestle dragons,
perform acrobatics and exact
precise recon exercises involving
long whittled tree branch rifles
and gatorade grenades...

the smell of barbequed ribs drifts
in the open window
while motorcycles roar by
in the distance...

and i wait to hear your tires
on the gravel
to complete the picture,
to complete the day,
to complete me.

the shining sun...

summer is happening here
finally...
sun shining, birds singing,
mosquitos the size of small airplanes...

meat defrosting for a tonight's bbq'd supper,
lawn mower ready for action,
a freind coming in town to meet up for lunch,
lilacs in the backyard.

things are good, very very good...
cold sliced watermelon in the fridge...
enough change in my pocket for an ice capp...
bring on summer...i am ready.

you may kiss the bride...

the wedding photos are finished...
it was so much fun...
stressful and fast,
but cool to be on the outside
just watching for those moments
that i would want documented
if it was my wedding...

this wedding had so much emotion...
sadly, the bride's mother passed away recently
after a lengthy illness...
but she was still with them in mind and heart.
often members of the family were tearful,
as shown in the bottom picture above
as the bride read her speech...

and this, this photo tears at my heart...
the bride's father, helping the bride's little daughter
get ready to be flowergirl...
his wife's name tattooed on his hand...
breaks. my. heart.
with. sweetness.

and in the end, i have decided,

i like weddings...i like being
on the outside looking in,
i like being the quiet observer.

more pics available on my website
and here