write it down, make it happen

so about a month ago,
i found a book in the bookstore.

it grabbed my attention right away...
it was called "write it down, make it happen"...
i wanted it but it was hardcover...
and yet...only 12.95

i brought it up to the counter,
pretty sure the price was wrong,
pretty sure i was going to be putting it back...

but no.
12.95.
it came home with me.

and i have been intrigued with it ever since.
each chapter focuses on different exercises for
writing it down
to get what you want.

one of the chapters talks about creating a group
a network, a buddy system, a team...
for support and for accountability.

and i love this idea.
anyone interested in teaming up...
in sharing goals...in providing a little pep talk every now and then...

the idea is to find someone who also has goals and ideas and plans...
and then to tell each other
this is what i want to do
this is how i am going to do it
this is when...
and to hold each other to it...

i was thinking of a weekly email
or possibly a blog...
i'm just throwing it out there
to see what comes back...

let me know what you think...

and then...there are days...

there are days
when you just don't feel like your
heart
can take any more...

and yet
it feels empty.

it is void
numb
null
useless
and yet
deceptively
full...
{of echoes}

and then there are days
where you just feel like giving up
like giving in
like throwing your hands up in the air
like relentless guilt
like wallowing despair.

and all you can do is
pick
yourself up off the floor
and dust
yourself off...

prop yourself up for another round.

days like today.

sunday night giving thanks...

Happy Thanksgiving {if it is Thanksgiving
in your neck of the woods
like it is here...}

I have spent this weekend trying to get caught up
on editing photos from this summer's weddings...
I feel like I did get a lot accomplished
but still have a long ways to go before I hit the end...
and the funny thing is
I just keep picking up more sessions as the days go on
even though I thought I would be done by now...

I feel I have much to be thankful for and since I have been planning
on starting a weekly "list of 40"
I think I will start with 40 things I am thankful for:

1. my husband {who is sweet and funny and supportive}
2. my kids {who I adore...they make me laugh and make me proud}
3. my health
4. the health of my family, both immediate and extended
5. old friends that I have had since elementary school
6. new friends made
7. my job...my full time every day of the week job...which I love
8. my second job...the photography business...which i also love
9. knowing that I live in freedom and safety and knowing that is not something
that I should take for granted, knowing that there are many who don't have that...
10. my camera, which has opened up a whole new world for me
11. this blog, which actually cracked open that whole new world even before the camera
12. cold diet coke in a can
13. my kia sportage which has worked well for me for a good price
14. internet connection
15. good food
16. security
17. a good sense of humor
18. the way my husband can always talk me off the ledge
19. positive feedback from friends and strangers on my photos
20. mike and ikes
21. caramel apples
22. damien rice (especially the song delicate)
23. that 15's panic attacks seem to be subsiding a little
24. that 15 spent the night at a friends' house last night...the first time in about 3 years...
25. brie cheese melted in a grilled cheese sandwich with ham
26. weekly phone calls with my mom
27. greys anatomy
28. my ipad
29. 10's excitement about his upcoming birthday
30. 10's sweetness when playing with the kids next door...he is so good with the younger kids
31. my external hard drive
32. presets
33. how today 10 suggested that I "relax for a bit from pictures and watch the Roadrunner with him" and how when I did he snuggled in beside me on the couch, his head on my shoulder...
34. crunchy fall leaves
35. the smell of woodsmoke
36. the sunrises i have been able to see lately when i leave for work
37. clarity
38. my relationship with my husband and kids...open, honest, respectful
39. lightroom
40. blog friends that feel like old friends to me now, after 5 years of following their lives and dreams and hopes and trials and successes...

and now...I am off to bed...tomorrow brings turkey and family and mayhem and giggles...
and I can't wait...
:O)

concise...

tuesday truths on a wednesday?

money sucks. not having money sucks even more.

debt sucks.

worry sucks.

fear sucks.

blue rodeo on the radio, bare feet out the window
cold diet coke in a can,
your kids running to the car to meet you even though
they are now 15 and almost 11,
your husband talking you down from your debt-fear-money-panicky-ledge...
these are good things...they make the bad less signifigant.

{and yes...i said concise...i did not say eloquent...heehee}

friday i'm love....

~with the kids having a no school day...which means
no lunches and early morning panic mode for me...

~with the warm temperatures we are having but the cool
wind accompanying it

~with this new show...it kills me...kills me.

~with accidentally wearing bright blue shoes with a pink
skirt and being told by random people that i can "pull it off",
that they didn't think twice about it, they thought i was just
be "eclectic" and "artistic"....heehee

~with the smell of woodsmoke in the air and how ten went
around last night trying to inhale "halloween"...