monday morning

i guess at this point
it is monday afternoon
but really...
when i can't figure out how to change the time on this anyway,
does it really matter?

woke up at 6 even tho i didn't need to get up until 8
went for a walk
made a to do list
called my mom about what to do about the memorial
tried not to think about things i can't do anything about

now it is raining
and i am melancholy
not ranty or crusty
or inspired and planning

my brother and his girlfriend-soon-to-be wife
were home for the weekend
planning the wedding
having wedding showers and birthday parties
their two boys are beautiful
and funny and odd just like the rest of our family
and we wouldn't have it any other way

i hope so much that after the wedding
they will be able to move back home
it would be great to have them so close
that we can get to know the boys
better than we have been able to
even over such a relatively short distance

i'm melancholy.
don't hold it against me.
i'll be back to my normal cursing and aggravated self
when the rain stops.

todays soundtrack: leonard cohen...