and again, i'm not here


you know...
my blog turned 6 on april 7
and i
didn't even notice.

poor little neglected blog,
how did things get this way?

i remember when we used to spend hours
together...
and now, it's only seconds throughout a day.
{i hope for that to change when i get this though}

but what really amazes me
is also the reason i have stuck with this
for this long...
the people i have met along the way...
the stories shared,
the connections made,
just the moments of feeling heard
and understood
at times when it felt like
no one would...

so happy belated birthday, little blog...
it's been an interesting trip so far.

suddenly may...


april flew by me in a flurry of
long car rides
stress
hours spent learning a new job
{within my previous job}
getting 14 ready for band trip
yard clean up
and mortgage renewing...

it has been a busy month.

but now i am looking forward to
spending some time on me again...
i feel like things are loosening up...
i joined a photography club,
i bought this book that i have wanted
for such a long time...
i took my camera out for a 3 hour date...
i bought some birdhouses to paint.

i am feeling like spring
is happening
inside of me.

april post-a-poem {8}

i see
those girls
your age
lurking around the local tim hortons
and my heart feels sick
as i listen to them curse jagged profanity
and cringe at their harsh giggles
and poorly done makeup....
and i think of you.
{my soft and sweet, my fuzzy peach cheeked...}
i hate to think of you
as hard
or jaded...
brittle
and mean.

those girls that look as tough as nails
but you know would shatter like glass
make my heart sink.

and i grieve for your fuzzy peach cheeks
as i compliment
your thick new mascara
that obscures your soft blue eyes

and you silently love me behind your teenage disguise.