well....this is it.
opening night tonight...
{shameless plug but there's still time to get tickets!}

if i said i wasn't nervous,
i'd be completely and totally
lying through my teeth.

i feel sick and excited all at once.
it's a strange feeling...
i can't wait for it to start
and i can't wait for it to be over
all at the exact same time.

the back and forth emotions of
being so scared i'm going to screw up my lines
or accidentally whisper bad words under my breath into the microphone
when i forget to pick up a prop...
to remembering the excitement of last year
and how amazing it was when you were backstage
and you heard that first roar of laughter...
and all the laughter that came after...in all of the right places...

so.

here goes nothing....
(and everything...all at once).

here's to many broken legs...
(I'm not sure if that is how one
wishes good luck to all of her cast-mates...
but...you get my drift, right?)

i have not been here
in a long, long time.

it's not that i haven't thought
about coming here...
i just got carried away
with spring
and tiny sprouting sunflower seeds
and planting string bean seeds
and daydreaming about
what to plant where
and how much
and should i build a fort
in the backyard
and camouflage it with string bean plants.

i feel a little obsessed.
but in a good way.
:)

my back is aching and my
tennis elbow does not like raking...
my neck is stiff and face is
slightly windburnt...
my polka dot rubber boots
have stepped in sheep manure...
most of the time, i have no idea
what i'm doing
but
that's kind of half the fun.

oh...and when i am not out tearing
the yard apart
i'm in the house rehearsing my lines
for the next play...
i know...i know...
i might have said i would never do it again,
ok...i might have swore that i would never do it
again but you know me...
i secretly like to be shoved out of my comfort zone.
and it really was a lot of fun last time...
and even better this time now that i have a little
better idea of what to expect.

and again...if you see me muttering and gesturing
to myself as i walk home from work,
it's ok! i'm just repeating my lines..over...and over...and OVER...
i'll understand if you don't make eye contact...
i would probably do the same.
:)